No Man Knows My Story
by The Enduring Man-Child
Summary: A litle exploration of the mystery that is Ned. Setting is nonspecific, but may be placed in the summer following graduation assuming BN was rebuilt quickly.
1. Chapter 1

**No Man Knows My Story**

**by "The Enduring Man-Child"**

_**All standard disclaimers apply.**_

_**The title is based on that of a 1945 biography of Mormon Church founder Joseph Smith,**_** No Man Knows My History, _written by Fawn M. Brodie._**

**Chapter 1**

"The usual, Ned; a salad for my lady and a naco for Rufus and myself!"

Silence.

"Yo, Ned my man, I said..."

"Yes, sir. One...salad...and one...naco...?"

Ron's eye (and Rufus' too) did their familiar twitching at the unfamiliar voice. Both looked up to see, not the usual bespectacled image of Ned, but a scrawny freckle-faced girl neither had ever seen before, who was evidently as confused by the order as they were by her being there.

"Um...where's Ned?" Ron asked.

"I dunno. Isn't he, like, the manager? I don't think he showed up this morning. Company had to call out an employee in Lowerton with a spare set of keys. We opened late and have been playing catch-up all day. So...you want fries with that?"

- - - - -

"A little late there, Ron. Why the holdup?"

Ron seemed a bit distracted as he sat down opposite his girlfriend in their usual booth. Even Rufus, riding on his shoulder, seemed strangely unenthusiastic about his favorite cheese-filled treat.

"Yeah. Sorry about that, KP. Some newbie taking the orders." He slid her salad to her.

If she found her order in any way unsatisfactory she didn't show it. Ron on the other hand looked at his naco with foreboding. It _did _seem a little messy. And once he had taken a cautious bite he wrinkled up his nose in disgust.

"Newbie doesn't have the touch?" Kim asked him.

"Eew! The cheese is all wrong!"

"What's the matter with it, Ron?"

"I like cheese as much as the next goofy sidekick, but this is overdoing it a bit," he answered as he held the naco up a bit from his tray. True, the thing was supposed to be a cheese-filled taco, but someone apparently thought the taco was supposed to be buried deep inside the cheese. It was messy to the point of being disgusting, even for Rufus' taste, as he plainly indicated his concurrence with his master's opinion by sticking out his tongue and giving a raspberry, after which he dove back into his cargo pocket.

"Well, there's always the salad bar!" Kim suggested. The look she received in response, however, indicated that this was not an option.

"Oh well. Wait a minute...Ron, you forgot the drinks!" This was totally unlike him.

"Huh? Oh, no wonder, Kim," he said, "Ned always includes two medium sized Slurpsters with our orders. I was so used to it I forgot to tell the new girl."

He started to get up put she put a hand on his arm to stop him.

"Let me," she said, "Maybe I can get you two a decent naco. Besides, I'm a little curious as to why Ned isn't here."

"Yeah, KP, come to think of it, the girl said something about him not showing up this morning and them opening late."

"Hmmm. So not like Ned. I'll be right back, okay?" She flashed him a smile to lift his spirits. And she being the girl of his dreams, it did.

"Okay, KP!"

Kim rose and walked to the counter. Unfortunately, there was quite a line there. The harried new girl was taking down orders with her hands while trying to balance a cell phone on her shoulder. Again, this struck Kim as odd. Even when Ned had a day off (which he rarely did) there wasn't this sort of chaos. She toyed with the idea of merely sitting back down and forgetting the whole thing, but her curiosity got the better of her and compelled her to stand until there was a breathing spell in the line.

"Um, excuse me...Lola" she said, reading off the hand-written name on the tag, "but things seem a little hectic today. Where's Ned?"

"Like, I wish I knew!" the poor girl said, "I'm from Lowerton myself. The usual assistant isn't very useful without the manager here and we're terribly short-handed. I'm calling the BN in Upperton right now asking for reinforcements. Can I help you with something?" She didn't ask the question with much enthusiasm.

"No...no, that's all right," Kim assured her, "You're having trouble enough without me adding to it." Kim wasn't sure, but she thought she could hear a very stifled expression of "Yessssssss!!!!" from...what was her name again?...Lola.

"But just out of curiosity, I'd like to know what happened today to keep Ned from opening the place. Do you have any idea?"

"No ma'am, like I said, I'm from the Lowerton BN," she said, "I'm just pulling emergency duty. Sorry."

Kim's curiosity was piqued. Of course, there was the other guy, the assistant. This was his BN, and he would certainly know what had happened to his manager.

"Excuse me...whoever you are," she said to the other, equally harried but slightly more familiar face, "you seem to be working short-handed. What happened to Ned?"

"I don't know, Kim," he said (hey, _everyone _knew who _she _was!), "but I'm afraid I don't. I don't know him outside of work, and from what the guy on the earlier shift said when I came in, he hasn't been here all day."

"Hmmm. Well...that's odd...er...whoever you are..."

"Eddie," he told her.

"Uh...okay...Eddie. Well, I hope he's all right."

"I wouldn't know," he told her, then immediately had to deal with yet another unsatisfied customer.

Kim was obviously deep in thought when she went back to her seat.

"Anything wrong, Kimele?" Ron asked her.

"I'm not sure. Ron, what do you know about Ned? Any idea where he lives or anything?"

"No, come to think of it I don't, KP" he told her, his brow now arching, "he doesn't go to Middleton High. He's gotta be a graduate, but I'm not sure what year."

"College student?" she asked.

"I don't know. I've never asked him."

"What about his family?"

"I don't know that either," Ron said, now rubbing his arched brow in a way that would have seemed perfectly natural for "Genius Boy." "Come to think of it, KP, I really only know Ned from Bueno Nacho."

"Now that _is _unusual," Kim responded, rubbing her own forehead in a way she sometimes did when she was trying to figure out something on a mission. "I'm not liking this. Here's this guy we've seen every day for it seems like forever, but almost always at the same place. And now one day he doesn't show up for work and no one knows what's happened to him...not even his co-workers."

"You don't think something bad has happened to him, do you, Kim?" Ron asked.

"I have no idea," Kim said, "but I'd feel a lot better if I knew he was all right and had just come down with a cold or something."

"Hey, that's it, KP! He's probably just come down with a cold! I mean, if even the Stoppable Fortress of Immunity sometimes fails to hold off the germs, you know it can happen to anybody!"

"Yeah! That's probably right, Ron!" Kim responded, "everybody comes down with a little something once in a while, and I'd say he's due, since I can basically . . . never...remember him...not being here since he started."

Ron and Kim both looked down again as she uttered this realization.

"But, oh well!" she resumed, "I'm sure it's no big! After all, if something really bad had happened I'm sure we'd all have heard about it by now!"

"Yeah. Yeah, you're right, KP, like you always are!" he agreed enthusiastically.

Kim resumed eating her salad in silence. Ron and Rufus had no interest in their over-cheesed, Slurpster-less naco, and planned on tossing it into the garbage can on the way out (Rufus would have to distract Kim though; she'd be majorly tweaked if she caught him wasting food).

- - - - -

"Well, good night, Ron. See you tomorrow!"

"You know it, KP!" he said, relishing the kiss she bestowed upon him at her doorstep. Then after parting it was no time before he was at his own house again. He responded to his parents' and his sister's greetings but not with much thought. He had something on his mind, and once he was in his own loft-room he determined to call Ned at his home and make sure it was nothing serious. He picked up the Tri-Cities telephone book, not knowing that at that same time in another loft-room his bf/gf was doing the same, having come up with the same idea. Unknown to the couple, both phone books opened simultaneously and both phones were activated. However, at the exact same time both books were slammed shut in horror as both teens realized something very strange about the gawky young man they saw almost every day:

They didn't know his last name!

_**To be continued... **_


	2. Chapter 2

**No Man Knows My Story**

**by "The Enduring Man-Child"**

_**All standard disclaimers apply.**_

**Chapter 2**

The hand snaked from under the cover and clumsily picked up the cell phone, knocking several action figures from the nightstand onto the floor in the process. This was altogether too early for anyone to be calling!

"Imperial Senator Bernilus. Speak, underling!"

"Larry?"

"Cousin?" Larry sat up at once. It was most unusual for Kim to call him. She generally avoided him as much as possible—not because she was ashamed of him or anything like that, but simply because she had absolutely nothing in common with him and had always found his company boring to the point of violating the Geneva Conventions.

"Larry, I'm sorry to bother you like this, but I need your help."

This was an interesting development.

Sure, Kim. Anything I can do to help you . . . save the world, right? Ask away!"

"Well, this isn't about saving the world," Kim confessed reluctantly, realizing that the disappointment was liable to dampen Larry's enthusiasm considerably. "It's about Ned . . . you know, the manager of the Middleton Bueno Nacho? He seems to have disappeared and nobody knows what's happened to him. It's really weird. I thought since you and he are sort of in the same circles," she hoped that didn't sound too patronizing, "that you might know where he is."

Larry did what he always did when faced with a conundrum of this sort. He picked his ear.

"Sorry, Cuz, but he was at the Robot Rumble last week, and he was at Nerd Nirvana"--the name of their comic book store hangout--"the last time I was there as well. This is the first I've heard of him being missing." He thought he could almost feel Kim's disappointment and . . . what was this . . . concern? . . . palpably through the cell phone. "But not to worry, I'll check with the landing party—um, I mean the gang—today and see if anyone has heard anything."

"Please and thank you! Oh, and, Larry . . . you really do rock! I'm sorry I haven't always appreciated you."

"Don't let it bother you, Cousin. One thing I learned long ago is that misunderstandings and lack of appreciation are common among different life forms."

This produced an uncertain silence on the other end of the conversation, followed by a protracted "Riiiiiiiight." And then, "Oh, by the way, Larry . . . how much do you know about Ned? Know where he lives? Or . . . um . . . what his last name is?"

Kim's blush at having to ask this question was as palpable as her earlier emotions had been. She realized there was something shameful in having to ask the last name of a person who was so much a part of her little world, however peripheral his place in it, and she feared Larry would judge her a typical popular snob, much too beautiful and important to take notice of someone as "lowly" as Ned. She had been ashamed enough when the words "out there, in here" had changed her life, and she had hoped that she was beyond such immature concepts of status as that.

In her loft bedroom she winced at the forthcoming rebuke.

It never came.

"Um . . . no, come to think of it, I don't. He's always been just plain 'Ned' to me." _And apparently to everyone else too_ each thought.

"But . . . listen, you two are about the same age. Did he attend Middleton High when you did?" Her previous shame was forgotten, replaced by mystification. How could someone so familiar to everyone be so unknown to anyone?

"Let's see . . . yes, we attended Middleton High together. But I think he was a class or two ahead of me—I'm not sure which. We hung out together and talked comics and science fiction and stuff . . . but he never talked about his private life. So I never knew where he lived or what his last name was."

"What about when he graduated?" Kim asked. "I mean, even if you didn't attend his commencement ceremony, he's got to be listed in the class graduation photo and records."

"He didn't graduate, Kim," Larry answered, his own curiosity (and consternation at how much he didn't know) now piqued. I remember him being in the class a year or two ahead of mine, but when they graduated he wasn't there anymore. I don't know what happened and I've never asked him. Huh. Funny." Larry was by this time becoming as intrigued by this mystery as was his cousin.

"But he'll still be listed in the yearbooks for the years he attended!" Kim realized. "Just look him up in your old annuals!"

"Um . . . about that . . . er . . . Kim."

Kim knew she wasn't going to like what she was about to hear.

"I never bought a yearbook while I was in high school. Just wasn't into that sort of thing," he confessed.

The ensuing silence indicated that his cousin was not pleased.

"You . . . you never . . . bought a yearbook? _Ever??_"

"Um . . . no. Just like I never got a class ring. I just never went for that sort of thing."

Larry heard a series of incoherent sounds that indicated Kim was trying her best to understand such a thing. And she failed.

"Larry, I know you're a little . . . 'different,'" Kim said, trying her best to not lose her temper and not allow her current high opinion of her cousin to revert to its predecessor, "But fcol, _everyone _buys their high school _yearbook!! _It's how you remember . . . "

"Kim, please listen to me," Larry said with a most uncharacteristic authority and seriousness, "most people might like to remember their high school years, but believe me, for some of us, it's a period of our lives we'd just as soon forget. Our memories aren't so pleasant as yours."

"Oh, Larry . . . " Kim was sniffling now. Larry had never heard her so contrite. "Please forgive me. I should have known . . . I shouldn't have said . . . oh, _stupid _Kim! _Stupid _Kim!"

"Kim, stop it! Right now!" Kim realized that Larry was after all a couple years her senior, and a legal adult. The fact that she had for so long looked on him only as a strange overgrown kid only magnified her wonder at the authority in his voice.

"Stop putting yourself down! You're a good person—always have been. There are just different kinds of people, that's all. You're one kind, and Ned and I are another. Besides," he added, "I'm far more culpable than you are. Ned's my friend. I see him all the time. _I_ should know this stuff about him—not you! So snap out of it!"

His tone wasn't angry or unkind, just commanding.

"Thanks, Larry. Sorry about that."

There was silence for just a moment.

"Listen, Cuz," Larry said after a while, "this whole 'sitch'—that's what you call it, right?—has got me spooked more than an invasion by undead zombie goblins from the Seventeenth Dimension. Tell you what let's do. I'll call Charlotte . . . "

"Charlotte? Who's Charlotte?"

"Um . . . never mind!" he spluttered, "You just let me get together with the gang and see what we can find out. I'm sure _someone _will have an annual. Meantime, why don't you call that computer guy of yours . . . Wade, right? I mean, he pretty much knows everything, right?"

"Yeah!" Kim exclaimed, "Duh! Why didn't I think of that before? Wade can hack the school records! We won't even have to look for an annual or anything! Thanks, Larry! As a certain foe of mine would say, 'you rock _heavy!_' As a matter of fact," she continued, "just don't worry about it. I'm sure Wade can solve the whole mystery in seconds. Sorry I woke you up! Well, bye!" And she was gone.

Larry just sat there, holding the cell phone that had abruptly clicked off on him.

_Yeah, right _he thought. _Kim's computer guy will have the whole thing solved in a few seconds. No need for me to get out of bed now. Only . . . _He realized that however much his help was unnecessary, he _had _to find out certain things on his own, for the sake of his own sanity. He hit the first (and only) number on his speed dial.

"Hello," a drowsy voice answered at last.

"Charlotte?"

"Larry?"

"Yeah. Listen, Charlotte, how much do you know about Ned? Skinny guy with glasses, hangs out at Nerd Nirvana and the Robot Rumble, manager of the Middleton Bueno Nacho? About our age, maybe a year or so older?"

"Um . . . all I know is what you've just said," the voice answered.

A most sour expression possessed Larry's features.

"Hello? You still there?"

"Oh yeah, sorry about that. Listen Charlotte, do you have any annuals from your time at MHS?"

"Yeah. Sure. What kind of freak wouldn't buy a copy of their high school annual?" she asked as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"Uh—yeah. Well anyway, I'll be at your place in twenty. Get out your old annuals. And if we can't find what we're looking for, we need to get to NN as soon as possible."

"What _are _we looking for?" she asked.

"I'll tell you when I get there. Later." And Larry cut Charlotte off as suddenly as Kim had cut him off.

"All right, Mr. Ned Whoever-You-Are, Mr. Man-of-Mystery! You may have eluded the rest of the world, but no way can you elude a twelfth level dungeon magus!"

And he was up.

Meanwhile, Kim had of course pushed the button on her Kimmunicator as soon as she had finished talking to her cousin.

"Listen Wade, we've got a first rate mystery going on here. I need you to—"

"_Hello! I'm not here right now. As much as I enjoy staying in my room, obviously something earth-shattering must have happened! So leave just leave a message and I'll get back with you as soon as I have solved whatever crisis has arisen! Thank you!"_

Kim just stared.

Her lip curled into an almost feral expression. Darn this! This was _not _going to beat her! She was Kim Possible! She could do _anything! _And that included solving the enigma known as Ned. She hit the first number on her speed dial.

"Mornin'! Mystical Monkey Master here! How may I help you?"

Even in the midst of all this Kim couldn't help but smile.

"Amp down, monkey man! You know that comic book store all the gee—um, I mean, all the enthusiasts hang out at? The one downtown?

"You mean Nerd Nirvana?" Ron wanted to know.

"I don't know!" she said, sounding more exasperated than she meant to. "All I know is it's the weird place Larry took me to on his birthday. You know the one?"

"I think so, KP. Why?"

"Ron—eat some breakfast and get your mission gear on! We're going down there to try to find out what happened to Ned!"

_**To be continued . . . **_


	3. Chapter 3

**No Man Knows My Story**

**by "The Enduring Man-Child"**

_**All standard disclaimers apply.**_

**Chapter 3**

The usual crowd was at Nerd Nirvana that morning. Well, most of the usual crowd, at any rate. They were awaiting their unofficial leader—dragon tamer, dungeon master, and magus, Imperial Senator Bernilus (Larry in the real world). He was a little late, but not to worry; he'd be there. And sure enough, the door opened and the King's subjects responded:

"_LA-reeeee_—_"_

But it wasn't Larry. Instead a very serious-looking Kim Possible, accompanied by her BFBF (somewhat reluctantly, to judge by his sleepy demeanor) stood there, loaded for bear.

"All right!" she exclaimed, "where's Ned?"

The "enthusiasts" looked at one another. Murmurs, shrugs, and other expressions of cluelessness abounded. They all looked at Ned's usual chair at the gaming table. Naturally, it was empty.

"Um...he's not here every day," the tallest of the group volunteered, "he's only here on his day off. So I assume he's at Bueno Nacho."

"Ned's not at Bueno Nacho," Kim replied with an edge in her voice, "he didn't show up for work yesterday and nobody knows where he is. You're his friends; do you have any idea what happened to him?"

There were more murmurs as the "enthusiasts" seemed very disturbed by this piece of news. Evidently this was the first any of them had heard of this. Obviously not BN customers.

"He was at the Robot Rumble last week, just like always," another offered. There was general agreement about this. But it said nothing about where he was _now_.

Kim sighed as though she wasn't really expecting an answer to her next question. "Anyone know where he lives?"

There were no murmurs this time. Instead the room froze and grew deathly silent. _Of course not. Why did I bother asking?_

Kim closed her eyes and rubbed her forehead as though trying to soothe a headache. "I don't suppose any of you know his last name?"

There was much looking back and forth among those present, after which the tall bearded guy again answered, "I don't know. He's just...Ned."

_Oh no, _Kim thought, _all these "friends" of his and they don't know any more about him than I do!_

That did it. Kim was not only seriously tweaked, but her weird-o-meter was going haywire. "You mean you guys hang out with him all the time and _you don't know the first thing about him?_"

"Woah, Kim, amp down," Ron suggested, "after all, we're his most loyal customers and we don't know anything about him either."

"I know!...I know! It's just that," and here she sniffled a little, "none of this makes any sense! Here's this guy we see all the time, he's a regular part of our world, and now he disappears and it turns out _no one _knows _anything _about him! It—it's not right! It doesn't make any sense for someone like that to be such a mystery! Besides...what if something terrible's happened? What if he's hurt? If no one knows who he is or where he lives, how would anyone know or be able to help him?"

"Say!" one of the nerds suddenly exclaimed, "there was a storyline very similar to this in _Green Gopher No. 51, _after they retconned everyone and started over at the beginning, and there was this girl in a blue dress in every panel, but no one knew anything about her, but she was always there, and then it turned out she was an alien in disguise spying on earth's defenses, and instead of being a girl in a blue dress her true form was a giant turtle, and—"

Ron gulped. Kim looked as if she were going to explode. But before she could blow, the door burst open and two more figures entered in some haste. And this time it _was _Larry (accompanied by Charlotte, which was a surprise to everyone).

"Quick! Where's Ned?" Larry asked.

"Um...you forgot the greeting," the tall one said.

"_Never mind the greeting!_" The entire room, including Kim, winced at this uncharacteristic show of emotion by her cousin. "This is serious! Does anyone know what's happened to Ned? Oh...hello, Cousin!"

"Hey, Larry," Kim answered. "I'm afraid you're going to be disappointed. We've already asked them about Ned and they seem to be as out of the loop as the rest of us."

"He was at the Robot Rumble last week." It was the same person who had said this before.

"I know. I was there too," was Larry's response, "and there didn't seem to be anything out of the ordinary. He didn't say anything about going anywhere. Hmmm."

Charlotte elbowed him.

"Oh yes!" he said, "Charlotte and I went through her copies of the Middleton High Yearbook, and as you may imagine, we can't find his picture or his name anywhere."

"There was a 'Ned' Somebody in the freshman class during my senior year," Charlotte added, "but it wasn't _our_ Ned."

"Some people don't like having their pictures taken," another member of the "posse" observed.

"True, but their names are still listed at the end under the heading 'pictures not available.' And there weren't any Neds listed even in this sparse category. Hmmm." Larry rubbed his chin and squinted, showing all that the gears were turning. Unfortunately, they came up empty.

The uneasy silence gave way to whispered conversations among the store's denizens. These were people whose lives were highly routinized. They were outcasts who had never known much real excitement, and so depended on fantasy for their personal fulfillment. They clung to each other because of a common experience of rejection and often outright cruelty by their peers, and this sudden disappearance of one of their number, with apparently no answer or solution, seemed to upset them a great deal. Kim was beginning to feel sorry she'd even told them.

Ron noticed her downcast look. "Don't worry, KP," he assured her, "we'll get to the bottom of this somehow. After all, we've saved the world—on numerous occasions, may I add?"

Kim smiled and couldn't help but be grateful for his optimism. "I know, Ron, but this is so...ferociously bizarre. This is almost like something out of the 'Twilight Zone.'"

"Yeah!" observed the same person who had mentioned the "blue girl" earlier, "Maybe Ned was an alien being from another dimension sent to spy on the three dimensional world so that..."

"_Shut it, _Clarence!" Charlotte commanded, and her tone was such that he did.

"I feel so guilty!" Kim said.

"Why?" asked Ron.

"Because," she sniffed, "I saw him every day and I hardly even gave him a thought. I don't think I've ever even _spoken _to him more than a couple of times. Oh, I am _such_ a snob!"

"Now cut that out right now, KP!" Ron commanded, "you are _so _not a snob! You're the nicest person I've ever known! You've devoted your whole _life _to helping people—and without charging any 'claud' to do it, too!"

"Thank you, Ron!" Kim responded, "but I still feel bad about taking him for granted...just like I took Larry for granted until he saved us from Dementor...just like I took _you _for granted until junior prom... Oh, I am _such _a snob!"

"Kim..." But she had wrapped her arms around him and lay her head on his shoulder, softly weeping. Ron didn't know what to do for her when she was like this.

"Kim..." This time it was Larry. "_Kim...!_" he said a little louder. That got her attention. She lifted her head from Ron's shoulder to look at him, and was taken aback by the serious look on his face.

"Please don't beat yourself up. You've done enough just to tell us about this. Ned's _our _friend. That makes him _our _responsibility. Why don't you go on and let us take it from here?"

"Wh—what are you going to do?" she asked.

"Waldo over there," he indicated the tall, bearded guy who seemed to be in charge in his absence, "has an uncle on the police force. He'll go to the department and see if anything's been reported."

"Yeah," the said personage reacted, "I could do that! Anybody want to come with?"

"We'll _all _go," Charlotte volunteered. "You two just leave this up to us now, okay? We'll let you know if we find out anything."

"Yeah...thanks, guys," Ron said.

He was still holding Kim when the last "enthusiast" had left.

- - - - -

Things at Bueno Nacho had settled down considerably. The assistant manager (who held down the fort on Ned's day off), along with someone who was evidently a manager from another local BN, had things operating smoothly once again. But that didn't ease the awful pinch Ron and Kim felt in the pits of their stomachs. It wasn't _right _Ned's not being there. And Ron, who interacted with Ned more often than Kim did, far from enjoying his Naco, was obviously distracted.

"So, do you suppose Wade's back yet?" he asked at last.

Kim activated her Kimmunicator. There was Wade's smiling face.

"_Hello! I'm not here right now. As much as I enjoy staying in my room, obviously something earth-shattering must have happened! So leave just leave a message and I'll get back with you as soon as I have solved whatever crisis has arisen! Thank you!"_

Ron shook his head. "Ned missing, and Wade not at home," he observed, "that _is _weird."

"Yeah," Kim agreed, her visage darkening as though putting two and two together, "I hadn't thought about that. But at least we know where Wade lives. Maybe we should call his folks?"

"Maybe we should!" Ron said.

Kim nodded and grabbed her cellphone, punching Wade's number on speed-dial. They were both pretty anxious by now.

"Hello?"

They both released a sigh of relief at the familiar voice of Wade's mother.

"Mrs. Load? This is Kim. Do you know where Wade is?"

"My, my, he took out of here early this morning, Kim. I had no idea a boy his size could move so fast."

"So you know where he is, then?" Kim's expectations rose.

"No, I'm afraid not, Kim," Mrs. Load said, "he didn't say where he was going, but he told me not to worry and that he'd be back later this evening. He was gone before I could ask him anything else, but I figured he knew what he was doing. Why—is something wrong? You haven't heard any bad news, have you?" The anxiety in her voice was impossible to miss.

"No Mrs. Load, we haven't heard anything," Kim assured her, and Kim could feel her relax over the phone. "I just need to talk to him, that's all. So he said he'd be back later?"

"That's what he said, Kim," Mrs. Load told her.

"Okay. Well...let's not worry then. I'll check in with my Kimmunicator later on."

"Okay, Kim. I certainly hope everything's all right."

_So do I, _thought Kim. But she said "I'm sure it is. Please don't worry. Good-bye, Mrs. Load."

"G'bye, Kim!"

Kim pocketed the cellphone.

"Well, what do we do now?" asked Ron. "I...I'm not really hungry for a Naco right now."

"Blah!" agreed Rufus, who also found himself uncharacteristically without an appetite.

"Doggie bag?" asked Ron.

"Doggie bag," both Kim and Rufus responded.

- - - - -

Ron had opted to go home with Kim until she heard something from Wade. The both of them were now lolling on the couch in front of the television set. It was on, but they couldn't seem to get interested in whatever was on. Kim had tried her Kimmunicator off and on but had gotten the same message.

Finally Ron spoke. "Five o'clock, Kim," he observed.

"Yeah," she said, "I'm not expecting him, but we'll try this again." She punched the button.

"_Hello! I'm not here right now. As much as I enjoy staying in my room, obviously something earth-shattering must have happened! So leave just leave a message and I'll g--"_

Then the taped message gave way to Wade himself. The relief felt by Kim and Ron—and by Rufus too—was palpable.

"Hey Kim. What up?" The familiar question was so comforting. Yet Kim noticed that Wade didn't seem exactly himself. He looked tired, harried, out of sorts. But at least he was there.

"Hey, Wade. You've been gone all day! Anything up?" she wanted to know.

"Nothing for you guys to worry about," he replied, "just been busy. So, what's going on?"

"Wade, do you know anything at all about Ned down at the...Bueno...Nacho...?" she trailed off.

Wade looked as if he'd been punched in the gut!

_**To be continued...**_


	4. Chapter 4

**My sincere apologies for the tardiness of this installment!**

**No Man Knows My Story**

**by "The Enduring Man-Child"**

_**All standard disclaimers apply.**_

_**Thanks to cpneb for beta-ing this and the previous chapters.  
**_

**Chapter 4**

"Wade, what's wrong?"

"Uh...nothing's wrong! Why do you ask that?" Wade was obviously fibbing, displaying all the "tells" (refusing to look her in the eye, touching his face, raspy breath).

"Hey Wade, don't make my lady use the PDP!" Ron warned.

"Yeah, and I'm in just the mood to use it!" Kim agreed.

Wade knew he was done for.

"Okay...okay. Anything but that." He took a deep breath. " Ned's in the hospital."

"He's _**what?**_" Kim and Ron said in unison.

"That's where I've been. Vivian discovered him yesterday at his apartment. His appendix had burst, and she called the ambulance. She took the day off to stay with him at the hospital and I pulled shift today while she went back to work."

"Wade, why didn't you tell us?" Kim asked.

"I didn't know you guys would consider it so important," Wade explained a little guiltily.

"Well, it _is _important! We're Ned's friends, and we're going over to see him right away! Oh, and we'll be sure to tell Larry and the gang over at Nerd Nirvana."

"Um...please don't do that, Kim," Wade said.

"_**What??"**_

"You probably don't know about this, but...well, Ned's a very private person. I mean a very, _very _private person."

"We'd sort of figured that out," she mumbled.

"Kim, have you been snooping around to find out about Ned? You've been _worried _about him?" Wade was beaming. "Oh, that's so sweet!"

"Of course I've been worried, Wade!" Kim said. "Why wouldn't I be? He's my friend!"

Wade stopped beaming to give her an accusatory look.

"Okay. Maybe 'friend' is a little bit of a stretch, but he's certainly..."

"He serves us our _Nacos, _Wade!" Ron interjected, "how could we _**not**_ be worried sick? C'mon, man!"

"Okay! Okay! I get it!" Wade said, holding up his hands defensively. "Middleton General, Room 601. Just don't tell him you got it from me, okay? I don't know if he'd like me getting too many people involved."

"Deal," Kim agreed.

- - - - -

Vivian didn't bother to interrupt her concerned stare at the still sleeping Ned when she heard a knock at the door.

"Come in," she said, expecting a nurse.

"Dr. Porter? How is Ned?" Kim asked.

Vivian turned around on hearing the unexpected voice, surprise evident on her features. She was still wearing her lab jacket from work and a bewitchingly alluring pair of "nerdy" spectacles, showing she had indeed come to the hospital right after getting off work.

"What are _**you two**_ doing here?"

It wasn't exactly how they had expected to be greeted, considering they had once cleared her name and gotten her job back at Middleton Space Center. Besides, why wouldn't she welcome anyone with whom to share Ned duty? There only seemed to be her and Wade, and that was cutting it awfully thin.

"Dr. Porter? Wade told us Ned was in the hospital and we came to see about him." Vivian looked at Kim's extended hand but didn't take it.

"He shouldn't have told you," she said, turning back to face the still unconscious patient. "I'll have to have a little talk with him about that. He knew better."

"I don't understand..." Kim said. "What's the big secret? Ned's our friend. We missed him. We were worried about him. A _lot _of people are worried about him! How can you expect to keep his whereabouts a big secret? What about his friends?"

"Oh. Well, he doesn't have too many friends," she answered.

"Monkey muffins!" Ron said. "Everyone who hangs out at Bueno Nacho is worried about him, and there's his fellow gamers at Nerd Nirvana and the Robot Rumble...like you! Why wouldn't they want to know where he is? Why wouldn't you tell them?" he wanted to know.

Vivian sighed.

"It's not so simple," she said, "you probably don't realize this, but Ned is a very private person. And I mean _very _private."

"So we've learned," Kim said, "and that's his right. But he's in the hospital! Wouldn't he want his friends to know? Or at least let the folks at Bueno Nacho know?"

"As I said, he's very private," Vivian replied.

Kim was tweaked.

"So, Dr. P—er, other Dr. P—Wade told us it was his appendix," Ron volunteered.

Vivian glared at him. "Wade's quite a blabbermouth. Now I'm _really _going to have a little talk with him."

Both teens winced. Neither wanted to get Wade in trouble, and neither could imagine why simply giving them this information should do so. But what could they say?

"When did it happen?" Ron continued at last, hoping to break her train of thought from what she was going to do to Wade. And sure enough any anger or irritation vanished from her face as she looked back at the still sleeping Ned.

"When I stopped by yesterday morning to pick him up for work he didn't answer the buzzer. I have a key and found in sprawled out on the floor. Poor Ned. I don't know when it happened—must have been some time over the weekend. So I brought him here and stayed with him...missed work to do it. I called Wade and he came and took my place last night and again today. So now it's my turn again."

"What about his family?" Kim asked. "He has to have _someone_. Why aren't any of them here? I'm sure Wade would be happy to track them down if you don't know—"

"He doesn't have any family that I know of...not that care anything about him, anyway," she answered.

Kim and Ron looked at one another, utterly stupefied to learn of the solitude of one whose face was so much a part of their everyday world.

"I—I don't understand," Kim said at last, sniffling a little and rubbing her eyes, "how could he have family that doesn't care about him? I mean—_everyone _is loved by his family, right? They're the people you can always go to, no matter what! How can anyone's family not care about him? How??"

Vivian looked directly at Kim.

"Miss Possible, you're a very nice person—there's no doubt about that. But I'm afraid despite your intimate familiarity with super-villainy and take-over-the-world schemes, you are also very sheltered and very naïve about what life can be like."

Kim cast her eyes downward, ashamed. This disturbed Ron.

"Don't listen to her, KP; after what you did for her she should be ashamed to talk that way to you."

"No...no, she's right, Ron," Kim confessed, "I really have led a very sheltered life. My genetics rock, my parents rock, saving the world rocks, my annoying brothers rock (much as I hate to admit it), _you_ rock...everything about my life rocks, Ron. And I guess sometimes I take it for granted that everybody else's life rocks too, and I know that it doesn't—whenever I take the time to think about it, that is."

"Well...don't beat yourself up over it," Vivian said, swiveling her chair to face them and taking off her glasses. "You can't solve everyone's problems for them, and I'm pretty sure if you could you'd do it. You're a nice person. Both of you are. I didn't mean to put you down."

"Well I should hope not!" Ron declared, almost yelling.

"Take it easy, Ron," Kim attempted to calm him.

"And if I never thanked you for helping me get my job back—and clearing my name—that time, well then...thank you, both of you."

"Now _that's _more like it!" Ron observed approvingly.

"Listen," Vivian said as she stood rather stiffly, "I've just been here worrying over Ned so much the past couple of days...I really need to get back to his apartment and find his insurance card. Why don't you come with, Kim?"

"Really? I mean...are you sure?" Kim realized that to actually see where Ned lived was a rare privilege indeed.

"Sure. We need the card—I certainly didn't spend any time looking for it yesterday morning—and I need a break. What do you say? Is your boyfriend up to spending a little quality time with the Naco man?"

"Well, Ron?" she asked him.

"Always ready to help a friend, KP...especially one who could use a few more friends."

"Good man! Then it's settled. Kim, you come with me. I could use your deductive skills to find that card. He didn't have his wallet on him when they came to get him yesterday and I was too distracted to think to look for it with all that was going on."

"All right; see you in a little while, Ron," Kim said before kissing him. "Take good care of Ned while we're gone."

"You know it, KP. I won't leave him for a second—er, unless I have to use the bathroom."

"And here's my cell number in case of an emergency," she said as she handed him her professional card, "and by emergency I _do not _mean having to go to the bathroom, capiche? I hope you won't need it."

"Me too, Dr. P...er, _other _Dr. P!"

"Good. Let's go, girlfriend!"

Ron watched the women exit and sat down to watch Ned.

"Wish I'd brought a book of _Tehillim _to say for you, old buddy," he said softly to the sleeping form in the bed, "but I guess I'll just have to be satisfied with saying '_barukh 'Attah HaShem 'Eloqeinu Melekh HaOlam, rofe' cholim!_'"

Ron wasn't sure, but he thought he might have seen Ned's lips just barely mouth a silent "'Amen."

_**To be continued...**_


	5. Chapter 5

**Again, my sincere apologies for the tardiness of this installment!**

**No Man Knows My Story**

**by "The Enduring Man-Child"**

_**All standard disclaimers apply.**_

_**As always, thanks to cpneb for the beta.**_

**Chapter 5**

Kim watched the setting sun from her seat beside Vivian in her obviously expensive, but externally modest looking, Honda. It was at the level where one could look into it without discomfort but still had rays and had not yet assumed the form of an over-sized orange. By its light Kim could see that they were on their way out of Metropolitan Middleton and moving in the direction of Lowerton. Is that were Ned lived, she wondered. If so, funny that he didn't work there instead.

As they entered the outskirts of Middleton Kim noticed a definite decline in the quality of the neighborhoods. Well, if Ned's home was indeed in Lowerton, maybe it would be in a nice neighborhood. She smiled. Over the past two days Ned had been transformed from a familiar face to an enigma, and now she was going learn where he lived, maybe even meet his family.

Unfortunately her musing was brought to an abrupt halt when the car stopped and Vivian announced "We're here."

Kim blinked. They were in the parking lot of one of those seedy once-upon-a-time motels that catered to travelers in the pre-Interstate and pre-Bypass days of yore that had long since become a set of decidedly low-class residences for people in who-knows-what sort of circumstances. Is _this _where Ned lived? Why? Where was his family?

Kim followed Vivian out of the car and to the door marked "36." Vivian took the key from her purse and unlocked the door. Slowly and with some protesting, the door creaked open.

Vivian flipped on the light. Kim's nose was assaulted by the combined odors of various species of mold and mildew that apparently had been left to grow unimpeded for some time. Her eyes were assaulted by—chaos.

"Oops. Should have warned you about the smell," Vivian said. "As a matter of fact, I really should have brought some Lysol. Sorry I didn't think of it."

"No prob," Kim replied, "If Ned can live here I'm sure I can stand it long enough to find his insurance card," though upon entering she wondered if this was indeed the case.

The aforementioned visual chaos consisted several elements. The walls here and there sported crookedly placed posters—Einstein giving the raspberry was joined by gaudy and colorful fantasy posters of various kinds. Walking required precarious stepping amidst comic books, computer disks, and the packages and contents of various role playing games. The cot against the far wall looked as if it hadn't been made in months. Likewise the computer shared its desk not only with disks and books of various genres but a long-gone-stale cup of coffee and a hideous slice of pizza that had been there no telling how long. Against the wall adjacent to the computer desk, from where it could be watched, was an old nineteen-inch television, a cable box on top and a VCR/DVD recorder on the tray beneath it. The latter was covered with sloppily scattered disks in clear holders, magic marker writing being their only labeling.

"Well, I have no idea where he might keep his wallet, but I suppose we might as well begin with the obvious," Vivian said as she opened the top drawer of the computer desk. Kim wasn't sure she wanted to look at the contents among which Vivian had to scrabble and instead picked up one of the books on the desk. Not surprisingly, it was a book of Escher prints. The book under it was on something called "Fermat's Last Theorem."

"Where do you want me to look?" Kim asked. She was not used to being a bystander, and after all, Vivian had brought her in order to use her deductive skills.

"Just make yourself at home," Vivian answered, absorbed in the task at hand.

Kim picked her way precariously to the cot, unsure what to do with herself. She felt something under her foot—it was a plastic "action figure" of some kind, cloaked and bearded and holding a staff. She was unsure for a moment if she wanted to sit on the cot and crinkled her nose at the prospect. She looked at the door in a nearby wall: must be the closet. Maybe she should look inside? No...not really something she wanted to do. She sat down carefully only to feel something else on the bed beneath her. Eww! She timidly retrieved the object and saw it was a battered paperback with a colorful cover illustration of a dragon and its rider. It was splayed open from long neglect in its current position. There was a tiny settee by the head of the bed holding an alarm clock.

"Found it!" Vivian announced in triumph. "Well, his wallet, anyway. I just hope his insurance card is inside. Ah...here it is. Mission accomplished!" She slipped the card out and into her purse.

"Sorry I wasn't any help," Kim said. She was not accustomed to feeling useless.

"That's all right. I wanted the company anyway," Vivian replied. "Why don't we go into the kitchen and see if there's any coffee?"

The kitchen/dining room was the only other room to the apartment, the first room seeming to serve as everything else. Well—there was a bathroom, or course, just as there was a closet. The door to this was in the wall perpendicular to that which separated the living/bed room from the kitchen. The door was closed and Kim was quite glad that this was the case. No telling how much fungus had been allowed to grow in there.

On entering the kitchen they found a slim refrigerator to their immediate left. After this was a counter with cabinets and a sink. A microwave often, in much need of cleaning was also available. The sink contained several plastic trays, obviously from precooked pizza or TV dinners (or both). A quick look inside the freezing compartment of the refrigerator (again, in need of attention in the form of defrosting) revealed the accuracy of this guess. The lower part of the refrigerator contained soft drinks, condiments, milk, a few eggs, and a some green vegetables. On the wall adjacent to the counter was a range. Unlike the other equipment they'd seen, it seemed practically new and unused. Indeed, the only indication it had ever been used at all was a greasy skillet on one of the eyes. The wall opposite the counter was bare but had a small eating table pushed against it. Like the range, it looked as if it were not subject to frequent use. One chair was pulled up to it.

"Looks like Ned does most of his eating in the other room," Vivian observed.

After taking inventory of the small room she went through the cabinets looking for the desired caffeine. She finally found a jar of instant and a few cups behind it. The first drawer she opened revealed the flatware.

"I haven't found any sugar. Would you like milk in yours?" she asked Kim.

"No thanks. I'd rather not take a chance on what's in the fridge," she answered.

"I don't blame you," Vivian said. Just take a seat and I'll mix us up a couple cups of black."

"Um, there's only the one seat," Kim reminded her.

"Duh! Sorry, wasn't thinking," she apologized. "How about you go bring the computer chair in here?"

"I'll be right back!" Kim told her.

Soon the two of them were seated at the tiny table (Kim took the regular chair at Vivian's insistence) enjoying their coffee. Especially Vivian, who got up twice to make extra cups.

"I know it's getting dark and this isn't a very nice neighborhood," Kim said after a while, having declined any further cup of coffee beyond her one, "but I wish you'd tell me a little about Ned. He's been such a familiar part of my world, but now I see I didn't know anything about him. Are you...free to do that?"

Vivian pursed her lips. "Why haven't you asked your friend Wade?"

Kim recalled that Wade had indeed seemed to be in on all this from the beginning. "I—I don't know," she said. "I just assumed that he wouldn't keep any secrets from me."

"Well, it seems the boy knows how to keep secrets," Vivian smirked, "and that you, above everyone else should appreciate that."

Kim realized at once that she was right.

"So...you're not going to tell me anything, right?"

Vivian seemed to think for a moment before beginning.

"Of course I haven't lived in Middleton as long as you. It was during that unfortunate incident with my former 'mentor,' Dr. Finn, that Wade asked me, while I had nothing else to do, to keep an eye on his friend Ned.

"Exactly how Ned got along before I became such a close friend I don't know. I assume he took a taxi to work, or biked, or maybe just depended on first one person and then another. But since Wade and I are his two closest friends, and I'm the one with the driver's license, I've done most of his chauffeuring of late. I suppose it's because of that fact that he told me so much.

"Ned's from Upperton originally. His father is some big shot professional of some kind. I don't know anything about him because Ned won't talk about him. They don't get along too well. I don't know if he had any brothers or sisters. I do know that his mother is dead, though not any of the details.

"Anyway, the family was Jewish though not particularly observant. But his dad noticed from early on that he was some kind of prodigy, so he sent him as a boy to the local yeshiva. That's where he got his elementary and middle education.

"Kim, have you ever heard of people who can pick up a volume of Talmud, stick a pin through the pages somewhere, and then, just from looking at the top page, tell you exactly what letter the pin goes through on every page all the way down?"

Kim was shocked. "I've never heard of such a thing! Are there really such people? And...you mean to say that Ned—_our _Ned, the manager of the Middleton Bueno Nacho—is one of them?"

"Oh yes, there really are such people, and 'our' Ned most certainly is one of them," Vivian answered.

"Then why...why does he work as a manager of a fast food place? With a mind like that he could do anything. He could go to Harvard. He could..."

"That's precisely _why _he works at a fast food place," Vivian said.

"I—I don't follow you."

Vivian went back up to the sink to mix yet another cup of coffee.

"His father obviously expected great things from him," she explained. "But when he was taken out of Yeshiva and put in regular high school...he just floundered."

"You mean someone that smart had trouble learning regular subjects?" Kim wanted to know.

"Oh no. In fact, just the opposite. He learned the subjects without any trouble at all. It was quite easy. _Too _easy. He got bored."

"I see," Kim said.

"So he dropped out of school. And why not? There wasn't any point to it. There wasn't any challenge at all."

"You mean he knew it all already."

"Oh no, not at all. It's just that learning what he didn't know required no effort whatsoever. One look. One lesson. Boom. Next grade, please. So he didn't enjoy it one bit. It was so boring. So as soon as he was of legal age he dropped out."

"What about college?" asked Kim. "However dull he found high school I'm sure he would have enjoyed that."

"Well...maybe, maybe not. It's all academic now anyway—no pun intended. But the way he explained it to me was that school at any level is simply agony to someone who can learn that quickly. As I said, it's not that he already knows it all—it's just that learning what he _doesn't_ know is simply so easy that it's boring. Four or more years are an awful long time to someone who can learn new information on just about any subject in a matter of minutes."

"Suddenly I feel so inadequate," Kim responded after a while.

"You and me both, girlfriend," said Vivian, to Kim's surprise. "Anyway, since he refused to conform to his father's plans for him he basically kicked him out: disinherited him. They have nothing to do with each other."

"That's—that's terrible!" Kim said, and she meant it. Her only experience of a family had always been so supportive and nurturing that she could hardly visualize any other kind. True, she knew in her mind that this too often wasn't the case, but this was dry _head _knowledge. Her _heart _simply couldn't conceive of such a situation.

"Is there no way he can get out of this awful place and get a better job?" she asked at last. I mean, for someone so gifted that they don't have the patience for _college _living in an old motel and working at Bueno Nacho has _got _to be torture!"

"You'd think so, wouldn't you, Kim?" Vivian answered. "But the fact of the matter is, unlikely as it may seem, he's actually _happy_."

"I—I don't understand."

"Neither do I, completely, but that's neither here nor there. The point is that this little two-room apartment, Bueno Nacho, the Robot Rumble, Nerd Nirvana—he's tickled pink. He's as happy as a lark. He's perfectly satisfied. And while I don't completely understand it, I'm glad that he is."

"But that doesn't make any sense at all!" Kim complained. "If he's so smart that a Ph.D. Program at a world famous university would bore him, how can he _possibly_...?" She let the question dangle at that point as words failed her.

"I think I know why," Vivian explained to her. "It's the _people_."

"Is that what he said?"

"No, because I've never asked him," she said. "But that's what he talks about whenever I take him to and from work. He's fascinated by the people. And I suppose it only makes sense," she added. "After all, those letters on all those pages of the Talmud never change. That's why they were so easy for him to learn. But people...they're all different. An infinite variety, each individual not only different from all the others but never completely the same from one moment to the next. And that boring little job of his is just perfect for watching, and studying, and dealing with people—and the same probably goes for the crowd at the Robot Rumble and the comics store too. I suppose to someone truly different like him us 'normals' are an infinite mystery. Can you imagine how alien to him a 'normal life' must seem?"

Kim looked down at the floor. "I'm so ashamed of myself!" she whispered.

"Why? What brought that on?" Vivian asked.

"Because I've always thought I was a good person...but I'm such a snob!"

"Why? Why would you say that?"

Kim actually sniffed a little. "Because: I have a great family and a great life. I have a great boyfriend and I help people all over the world. People everywhere know who I am. And I've always felt so proud of myself. I've tried not to act it, but I've always felt so proud."

"Well? Why shouldn't you?" Vivian said. "You have every right to, and I don't think you act proud at all."

"And poor Ned...he's had this life and I knew nothing about it: never even thought to ask him. I just always took him for granted. Oh, I am _such _a snob!"

"Now cut that out, Kim!" Vivian's tone was harsh and devoid of sympathy. "You're a wonderful person and you know it. You're just a little shocked to learn this about someone you thought you knew and, if you're honest, probably still feeling a little inadequate too. That's no reason to start putting yourself down, so you stop it right now!"

Kim raised her eyes to look at Vivian. "You don't think I'm a snob?"

"Not at all! You're a hero, Kim! People all over the world owe their lives to you! Heck, I owe my job you, and I haven't forgotten—even if I haven't been acting like it this evening. The only thing you need to remember is that there's more than one kind of hero. You're one, you're boyfriend is another—and in his own way Ned's a hero too. I suppose the world is full of heroes when you think about it, whether the traditional kind like you, or the unconventional kind like Ned."

Kim was about to say something else when they heard the slam of a door from an adjacent apartment followed by loud talking from the other side of the wall, which reminded them this wasn't the nicest place for two attractive and unescorted young ladies to find themselves after dark.

"I think that's our cue to be getting out of here," Vivian said.

Kim could only agree.

Vivian finished her coffee and put the cup in the sink ("I really should come over and do a little housecleaning for him while he's recovering," she observed), checked her purse to make sure she had the insurance card, and the two of them returned the swivel chair to its place at the computer desk, turned off the lights, locked the door, and got back in the Honda. They wasted little time in getting back on the road.

Both ladies were silent on the way back to the hospital, each deep in thought.

_**To be continued...**_


	6. Chapter 6

**Again, my sincere apologies for the tardiness of this installment!**

**No Man Knows My Story**

**by "The Enduring Man-Child"**

_**All standard disclaimers apply.**_

_**As always, thanks to cpneb for the beta.**_

**Chapter 6**

Kim was relieved when she and Vivian reentered Ned's hospital room to see that Ron was sitting quite close to him, apparently engaged in conversation. Sure enough, on drawing closer she noticed that the familiar-figure-turned-enigma seemed to have come to, though he was still very groggy. As of yet, he hadn't noticed the new arrivals, and Ron's own unawareness of their presence was made obvious when he jumped at Kim's hand on his shoulder.

"KP! You guys are back! And look, Ned woke up! Isn't that great?"

"It's about time," Vivian said sarcastically as she too stood at Ned's bedside. "I hope you've enjoyed spending the last two days lying around on your backside. You should be ashamed of yourself, you lazy thing."

"Vi...Vivian?" Ned murmured weakly. "Sorry about that. I'll...try not to bust my...appendix again!" He looked like he would have liked to laugh at this observation but was too sore and too weak to follow through. "Look, Viv...Ron...Ron's here!"

"I know," Dr. Porter said, "he's come to carry you bodily back to Bueno Nacho. The poor guy's about to starve, waiting for you to feed him again."

"Yeah...I noticed he's skin and bones. I'll have to...get right on it."

Kim felt like an outsider watching her boyfriend and Vivian peering at Ned. And, after learning about him, she also felt something very unusual for "the girl who could do anything"--inadequacy. And a little guilt too, for taking for granted that Ned was just another burger flipper when his story was so fascinating and so unusual. This almost invisible guy, this familiar and oft ignored background figure in her daily life, was actually very special.

Wow.

She was about to quietly sneak out of the room for a cup of hot chocolate or something and leave Ned to his real friends when Ron seized her by the arm and brought her up beside the bed as well.

"Look who else is here, Ned!"

Kim's unfamiliar self-consciousness wasn't improved by the fact that Ned's countenance seemed to darken.

"K...Kim? What is..._she_...doing here?"

"She was worried about you, Ned!" Ron answered. "Weren't you, Kim?"

Kim's discomfort increased at Ned's seeming disapproval of her presence.

"Hi Ned," she said at last. "I missed you at Bueno Nacho. I'm really sorry you got sick. Um...hope you get better soon. Middleton's not the same without you keeping everything running smoothly at BN."

"Yeah. Yeah," he said, his expression lightening. "I imagine...things have really gone to pot...without me there."

"You know it, buddy!" Ron assured him.

"Ned...?" Kim said, realizing this might be the first time she had ever addressed him, at least outside his usual station behind the counter at Bueno Nacho, "I'm glad you're awake. Uh...I hope you don't mind...I mean...is it all right for me to be here?"

Ron turned to her utterly perplexed at why she would ask Ned such a question.

"S...Sure. Just didn't know...you cared. Thanks...for coming."

"Listen, you two," Vivian offered, "I'm going to run down and see if there isn't someone in the insurance office to take this card. You keep this shirker company till I get back and then, now that he's finally decided to rejoin us, I say we leave him to the nurses here and get some rest. It's been a long day. What do you say, Specks? You think you can do without a baby sitter for a while?"

"Yeah. Sure," he said. "I'm just sore, that's all. Kinda...comes with the territory."

A nurse picked that moment to enter with some pain pills and a small glass of water.

"So we've got a sore belly, have we?" she asked. "I'm afraid that's going to take a little while to go away. But I've got you a Tylenol and a sedative here."

"What's this?" Vivian scolded. "You've just woken up after being asleep for _two days_ and now you're going to nod off _again_? I've never heard anything more irresponsible!"

Kim winced at the way Vivian was speaking to Ned, though she assumed it was her usual way of bantering with him and that he understood. She certainly hoped so. She was relieved when, after the nurse had administered his medicine and left, Vivian leaned over and kissed the suddenly blushing patient.

"Sweet dreams, Specks," she said, "Sorry I let this happen to you. I'll have to take better care of you in the future."

"Ulp!" Ned said, grateful to feel the sedative beginning to kick in.

"Well, then," Vivian turned to the couple with her, "I'm going to run this card by the insurance office and call it a night. What about you two?"

"Will he be okay?" Kim asked.

"Are you kidding? They'll baby him so much when he gets out he'll be trying to think of a stunt to get back in."

She looked at Ned's once again sleeping face. "Yeah, he'll be all right." Then she hugged the two teens. "Thanks for worrying about him. I'm so glad his not being around was noticed by someone else. I worry about him so much."

"You kidding?" asked Ron. "Not miss Ned? How could _everyone _not miss him?"

With a grateful smile and one final glance at Ned, Vivian left.

"Well, ready to call it a day, KP?" Ron asked his girlfriend.

"Ron...do you think I'm a snob?"

Ron looked at her with astonishment, having no idea where the question came from. "A snob? _You??? _No way! You're the least snobby person I know! Er...why do you ask?"

"Never mind," Kim said with relief. "I'm just sorry I had to learn the same lesson twice."

"Which lesson?" Ron asked.

"Never take anybody for granted," she said, eyeing him affectionately.

-----

**Epilogue: One Week Later**

Bueno Nacho was certainly working much more smoothly now that Ned was back. He seemed none the worse for wear, and the 'Welcome Back, Ned!' banner and collection of cards from well wishers taped against the wall certainly didn't hurt.

"Well KP, Ned's in his kitchen and all's right with the world once again!" Ron observed with his usual optimism.

"Yes it is," Kim agreed.

"So have a seat and I'll order for us. Er...what do you want, the usual, or a little something special to celebrate the prodigal's return?"

"Why don't you sit down and let _me _order, Ron?"

Both Ron and Rufus suffered a temporary shutdown of their faculties, their left eyes twitching perceptibly.

"Hey, it's no big," she assured them. "I just want to take a look at closer look at the menu and see if I've been missing anything. Besides...I want to say hello to a friend."

Both Ron and Rufus smiled.

_**The End**_


End file.
